1. My anaconda don’t want none unless you got lumps, hun!

    (Source: popcrimes, via flameobender)


  2. spoopybarakarts:

    when my mom was 30ish, my dad took her to this garage band concert as a date and she really liked them so she bought a cd from them and talked to them for a few hours then promised to keep in touch with them and show everyone her cd, but later forgot. So 10 or so years later theyre on the radio and she just smacks her head then says, “fuck i forgot to show everyone the cd” and that is the story of how my mom let Adam Levine and the rest of Maroon 5 down.

    (via halfagony-halfhope)


  4. if robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money id just laugh and search with them

    (Source: carlmander, via gnarly)


  5. cartel:

    when will they make water proof books so I can read in the shower or bath

    (via fake-mermaid)

  6. 💜💜

    (Source: diablosita13, via ash-suyin)


  8. yxnnick:

    to bae or not bae that’s the question

    (via spookyscarygodsonolympus)

  9. (via gnarly)

  10. shoot-the-smiley:


    (via whatever-fangirl)


  12. john-egbert:


    do you ever look at some photos and just go “how the fuck did anyone manage to take that”


    (via assbuttswithbowties)


  13. sarahtypeswords:

    just little teenage things: teaching yourself the content because your teachers don’t teach

    (via assbuttswithbowties)


  14. fartgallery:

    hey guys I know its the middle of the night and im currently robbing you but I just heard a spooky noise in your kitchen and now im scared… can I sleep in here with you guys?

    (via fake-mermaid)

  15. (Source: lolgifs.net, via onlylolgifs)